Profane pronouncements are not always pretty or proper

I admit it: I have a foul mouth.

But instead of being chagrined by that fact, I revel in it. I love trashy talk. It gives me verbal purpose. When my boyfriend and I first began dating, he said, "You curse like a sailor, but I love it." And it's a good thing that he loves it, because I wasn't about to curb my cursing for him. Besides, he's not exactly saintly in his own speech.

That said, I do think cursing has its place. Of course it's not always "proper" to lace one's speech with profanity. Sometimes you have to formalize your speech, and forego the"fuck yous" and shelve the "shits" and banish the "bitches and bastards," and so on.

Furthermore, it's not always necessary to curse, and yet some people think it is. They think it gives them more "aggression credibility" if they pepper their pronouncements with profanity. Indeed, one of my least favorite columnists in our local weekly rag feels the need to toss in curse words every fifth sentence or so. It's annoying, and one of the reasons I dislike her column.*

And then I realized that I have used a lot of profanity in my blog so far. The thing is, I don't use profanity disingenuously. It comes from the gut; it's a visceral thing with me. I don't do it to be "cool." I do it because it flows naturally from my tongue, and anything that comes from my tongue comes first from my gut. There's no cerebral interference here; my gut does all my talking, while my brain often looks on in horror.

So the point of all this is to say that I am going to strive to be more cautious about cursing in my blog, because I realize that it can come across as disingenuous. It's not that I am worried about offending people with my potty mouth, it's that I don't want my profanity to be misconstrued. I don't want people thinking I feel that I MUST curse to get my point across. Very often profanity can UNDERMINE what we are trying to say, and I don't want that. Words and ideas are sacred, and can be tainted by profanity if it's misused.

On the other hand, cursing can enhance something being said, especially when the cursing in used in colorful or comic contexts.



*The other reason I dislike her column is that it sucks.

The Democrats are a bunch of pussies and pricks

The proof is in the pudding.

Fuck 'em.

I can die now

I have seen Roger Waters perform Dark Side of the Moon.

Feisty femmes rule

There is a music forum I frequent.

And on this music forum exist some specimens of the male persuasion who loathe me and my aggressively opinionated ways.

Some men are stuck in an evolutionary time-warp. They cannot abide women who are as assertive as men, if not moreso, because it threatens their gossamer egos.

Thank god (or should I say, thank Sappho) for men like my brother and boyfriend who not only like women who are feisty and forceful, but who actually seek them out.

Feisty femmes rule, and the males who hate them suck.

Thank Nietzsche it's Friday

Nietzsche said: God is dead.

God said: Nietzsche's dead.

Both are correct, of course, except that really, can something die which never existed in the first place?

But I think Nietszche was referring to the CONCEPT of god, rather than any sort of genuine divine presence . It's been a while since I read good ol' Nee-cha, but I'm pretty sure he was referring to the conceputal Holy Father, invented by humans to help assuage anxiety and navigate ineffable mysteries, and discarded by us when the utility of his existence expired. In other words, we didn't NEED god anymore, so we made him disappear.

In any event, I'd like to personally thank Nietzsche for illuminating the idea of a deceased deity.

Rock on Nietzsche. I hoist a sweating goblet of Pinot Grigio in your honor!

Electoral Follies, Part One

If I had $100 for every progressive person who said, "I agree with everything Dennis Kucinich says, but he's not electable, so I'm not voting for him," I could send that money to Kucinich and BAM! He'd be electable!

America's electoral system is a sick sorry sham, because it promotes ONLY those who have the massive moolah required to even be considered. And the conspiring media suppresses information about REAL Democratic and progressive leaders, like Kucinich, or makes mockeries of them, like Ralph Nader, which creates the pervasive misperception that only corporate charlatans like Obama or Hillary Clinton are viable candidates.

Thank Buddha It's Friday

If there were a Judeo-Christian god, he would be too much of an asshole to create Fridays - after all, if he did exist, then the fact that he would allow the human race to procreate is proof enough of his malevolence.

Buddha, on the other hand, was one cool cat. Granted, he likely didn't exist either, and is just an archetype for people to pattern their lives after. And, true, Buddha is not a deity in the traditional sense, so even if he did exist, it's not like he created the world or anything.

But anyway, none of that matters, because Buddha WOULD create Fridays if he were one of those cool creation-deities like the Judeo-Christian god, or allah .

Buddha would be ALL OVER Fridays. Because Friday is the end of the work week, and Buddha promoted the Middle Way, which could be interpreted as a balance between work and play. And Fridays, at least Friday nights, are all about PLAY.

Fuck Mondays. It's all about Friday. And Saturday. And Sunday.

Come to think of it, fuck Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday too.

I'm not sure the Buddha would approve of doing away with the work week altogether, but I do know he would have no problem reveling in leisurely frivolity, the likes of which one seeks on weekends.

Speaking of doing away with the five-day work week, there is a group, Five Day Weekend, which promotes just that.

It's movements like this that prompt me ask myself, What Would Buddha Do?

Viva La Revolution!

My French boyfriend said my post about Frogs and Flags was a superficial analysis of the French situation. He didn't vote for Sarkozy, mind you - he votes Trotskyist whenever possible. But he thinks I didn't delve deeply enough into the situation.

But I'll be a benevolent blogger and leave the astute political analysis to Bill O'Reilly and Fox News. I'm just here to create a frivolous diversion to all the profoundly intellectual news coverage that pervades the airwaves.

You know, that dangerously liberal media we all hear so much about. It's a Commie Conspiracy and it'll have us all peeing PINK!

Outsource this

I have a novel idea: Outsource CEOs. Fire every executive, and leave them with no retirement package or any tangible benefits whatsoever. Then give their jobs to workers in India for $2 an hour.

It's all part of globalization, we'll tell them, as they weep into their styrofoam coffee cups full of peddled change.

Frogs and flags

You know what? Fuck fascism. French President-elect Nicolas Sarkozy is promising to usher in a new era for France, one wherein the frogs will relish their Frenchy-ness anew. In other words, he wants to bring back Napoleon-style Nationalism. Ooooh, cool - we need more flag-flapping freaks in the world, just like the ones who inundate the sanitized suburbs of Generica.

Whatthefuckever.

We love to stir meaningless debate and it shows

According to the Atlanta Urinal Constipation , there's a controversy brewing over Delta's new logo. Because, of course, it matters what the hell a plane LOOKS like, as opposed to how well it, oh, I dunno - IS BEING MAINTAINED.

Because, you see, Delta's maintenance is being outsourced to, um, ANOTHER COUNTRY in order for the oh-so-beleagured company to save money. Poor Delta execs just weren't swimming in enough loot - after all, that extra mansion has a hefty mortgage!

Hopefully the next time you fly Delta the plane won't fall apart mid-air.

Just a happy thought for the day.

We love to outsource and it shows

So Delta Airlines emerged from bankruptcy, and set out to spend millions on a new logo and paint job for its planes to herald the company's rebirth.

So let me get this straight: Delta couldn't afford to keep thousands of workers such as the ever-important maintenance crew, and treated other employees to severe paycuts, and yet it can slap down thick stacks of greenbacks for some new hues and a slick hollow phrase?

I have a proposal for a new logo, and I donate it to the airlines absolutely free of charge:




Hey, I'll even throw in a gallon of paint to help get them started.